Brotherly Love

[chimeramimicry]

I'm almost too late.  I can feel the surge of air in the room before I even pry open the door.  We're up at the penthouse level, the suites.  It's high enough for the broken windows to suck the doors closed.  I'm breathless when I push my way inside.  I see the scuffle.  I hear Nathan's labored breathing.  I have no idea what I do exactly.

It goes back to a time when I lost Nathan.  I was young when my brother went off to serve his country in the Navy.  We're thirteen years apart.  It's a lifetime, really.  I didn't understand that my brother would not be there to wake up to anymore, or to climb into his bed when the monsters came.

The monsters have come again.  One in particular.  One I'm not strong enough to fight.  And yet, he leaves Nathan to me. Badly wounded, hardly breathing, sure.  But alive.  I can almost feel my knees give out as I scoop him up to my chest.  I should go after Sylar.  But I can't move from Nathan's side.

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[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

It hurts, getting your throat slashed. Some guys in the Navy once told me a slashed throat was like bleeding out then going to sleep, but this is hell. I can hear my heart beat slowing and I struggle to draw in a breath to keep it going.

I feel like someone is holding me and for a second I fight them until, Peter's smell reaches my nose, that combination of musk and honey that always calms me down.

"Peter," I try to say horrified at how garbled my voice sounds, "so sorry.."

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

At least I know triage. This has been my training. Though his pulse is weak, Sylar did not cut into his windpipe. He's able to draw in a breath, no matter how ragged it is. His artery has not been severed, just nicked. I take his hand in mine -- my God, it's so much larger even now -- and force my older brother to clamp down on his throat.

"You've got to stay with me." He's a prick. For my entire life, all he's done is used me and manipulated me. That's the problem with love though. It doesn't matter. It's also a problem with family. I've lost enough lately. I've lost entirely too much. "I swear to God Nathan, if you don't stay with me--"

I don't have time for this coddling. Nathan is a solid man, heavy in my arms, but I can fly. I have no choice. He needs a doctor, a surgeon. I can only do so much. It's a wonder I don't kill us both when I hand in the parking lot.

"HELP! We need help here!"

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I keep my eyes focused on Peter's face so I don't pass out. It hurts so damm much and part of me just wants to give up. I deserve to die this way, I know it and I know Peter knows it too, but something is making me hang on.

It's love...I love Peter and I'm not ready to leave him yet. I remember the days before powers and car accidents and politics ruined what we had. I turned to drink because he wasn't in my life...hell I think the whole hunting thing was because I just wanted Peter to listen to me.

I struggle to take another breath as a trauma team takes me from Peter. "Don't...need him," I beg.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

Nathan's bloody hand slips from my fingers and I watch him go with wide eyes. This is not the first time this has happened to him. To me. To us. I should be use to traumatic runs to the hospital's emergency ward by now. "I'm a paramedic!" I call to the team that takes my brother away from me.

"Then you know you stay here!"

I want to hit that man, but instead I fist my hand in my hair, turn in circles, and finally jog through the halls mindless of what anyone says to do or stop me. I can, at the very least, stand at the window as they work on him.

Tears run down my face, I don't even try to stop them. If he doesn't pull through, my life is over.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

Everything becomes a blur after they take me away. People yell things at each other and at me about blood, staying awake, surgery. They mostly seem worried about keeping the blood flowing in me instead of out of me.

I even hear the doctors saying something about my vocal cords and possibly not speaking again. I mentally panic, what kind of Senator can I be without my voice...I'll never be able to fix the mess I made without it.

Not only that but I'll never be able to ask for Peter's forgiveness. The stress of these thoughts finally make me pass out.

I'm sorry Peter....please be here when I wake up

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I still Peter for a moment, I have to tell him how I feel and I have to do it now. I don't want something to happen and I don't say something.

I tap his heart. "In....love....with....you," I say and lean forward to kiss him gently on the mouth.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I balk, perhaps understandably, pushing away from my brother with wide eyes. His mouth is stale. His lips are hot. They make me tingle in the worst way. How could he-- Did I hear him right? Impossible. But how do I explain that kiss? And the way he's looking at him.

It dawns on me that my brother's pain has probably made him hallucinate. I smile at him, I touch the curls of his hair and shake my head. I ignore the tingle and the way it makes my stomach clench.

"It's Peter, Nathan," I whisper. Does he think I'm Heidi? Tracy maybe? Both of his women are gone from him now.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I shake my head not wanting to believe that Peter couldn't feel the same way I do. All those touches and kisses over the years that came close but not quite it wouldn't be fair for him to tease me like that.

I tap his chest and shake my head again trying my best to get my point across without hurting my throat. "I...in...love...with...you...Pete....you mine."

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

Yes, my heart just stopped. He's not confusing me with anyone else. He's saying something that I've been thinking about, off and on despite how he's always treated me. It started when I was six, sure that I'd grow up to be his wife, of all things. I told my a therapist when I was twelve that I loved my brother. That I loved him more than I should. At fifteen, when Nathan got married, I begged him at his bachelor's party to just move back home with me. On the night I graduated, when Heidi was a little drunk and dancing with a few other women at my party, I pulled Nathan out onto the balcony and we slow danced. It was silly, but we were brothers. Brothers.

And now he drops this on me. I feel like I've been slapped, or maybe that's some form of precognition I don't know I have yet. He couldvery well slap me after I lean in to kiss his stale lips, pressing too hard before he can taste my tears. I'm always crying when it comes to Nathan.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I bring my hand up to cup the back of Peter's head and bring him closer. This is not really how I thought our first kiss would go...me wounded on his bed, but it's Peter and we are together.

When it comes down to it I will choose him every time. Hell the only reason I stopped him from blowing up New York was because I knew I would lose him forever if I did.

I do wish my breath smelled better though.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I scoot as close to Peter as he'll let me and fold my body into his trying my hardest not to look weak. It's been drummed into me that Petrelli's do not look weak, they hide the truth. But I don't want to hide anymore, I want to feel comfortable in my own skin and start to heal from the wounds given to me by our crazy family.

"Peter...I'm sorry...I know I'm not worthy of you and I never have been, but I still need you...I love you so much."

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

He's told me this so much that it's making me tingle, making my blood boil unnaturally. He could say it forever, replace every other sentence he says from now until the say he dies with those three words and I swear to God it will not be enough.

My breath catches as he presses against me. It's not as if this is the first time we've hugged like we were more than brothers. I remember mom talking to Nathan about it during his campaign a lifetime ago that he had to stop being so touchy with me in public. That people would talk. He's never held me, never kissed my neck, never really looked at me as if all he saw in me was his brother.

"I...know..." It's lame, I get it. But Han Solo said it to Leia once. I remember being ten and curled up in my older brother's arms in our television room at the mansion, my ear against his heart. I asked him why she wasn't angry that he didn't say he loved her back and Nathan told me that I'd understand one day.

I think today's that day.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I want to laugh, trust Peter to make a Star Wars reference in a serious moment and trust me to know that he's making one in the same moment.

I lean forward to kiss him again. "Peter....I...will you...make love to me."

My face flushes again, it should be easier to ask for something I've had done to me before but this is Peter I'm talking about.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I had just been getting into kissing Nathan. Really kissing him. My mouth had opened, my tongue had touched his, and I was certain that I'd make it through this little slice of taboo sin without fainting when he drops the rest on me.

I've frozen. Frozen solid. My eyes search his with fear and dismay. He wants to go from brothers sharing shockingly romantic kisses to brothers have sex? Just like this?

I've never been with a man before. My sexual exploits are...just about nothing. My prom date, two weeks after prom at my family's shore house. A fellow nurse during my internship. Simone. Caitlyn. Yeah, I've gotten around.

"W-what?"

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I freeze terrifed that I've pushed Peter too far too soon. I stammer for a moment trying to explain my request and then I freeze again. Did I make a mistake telling Peter the truth.....will he understand why I want what I want.

"I want...you...inside me," I finally say my face flaming scarlet, "I like....when other people top me."

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I'm pulling at Peter's shirt, pushing at it, even tearing at it to touch skin. God he's so warm that I feel like my hands will burn up if I don't get to touch him more.

My heart beats out it's own song of love, love, love and I want to start crying all over again. How can a love this powerful, this wonderful be wrong. We kiss and kiss, touch and touch and it doesn't feel like enough.

"Peter please more, please," I beg

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I stradle one of his legs, just enough to press our bodies together. I can feel his breath mingling with mine as he hold tightly to one another. Us. This is definately what an us is suppose to feel like. My skin is on fire as Nathan removes my shirt. Maybe remove isn't the right word.

He's torn it off of me.

I'm a little more gentle with his, gazing down into his eyes as I reveal more and more skin. My fingertips trace his flesh. My flesh. He and I share so many similiarities. I scratch my nails down his chest as I run my fingers through the soft curls of hair I find there. I give him a little tug. I want him close.

I don't know how far this will go tonight, but i want to explore it. Slowly.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I arch up to press my mouth to Peter's hard and hot. When he opens his mouth my tongue slides back into the velvet smoothness of his mouth and I lap at every corner and nook. He tastes like cheap whiskey, salt and something that is just Peter.

I am already addicted to it, I'd laugh is my mouth wasn't full.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

It's my turn to suck on his tongue and I do it with relish. I've always loved kissing. It's my favorite part of being in a relationship -- or being drunk at a bar I suppose the few times I scored at one. I'm not sure how long has passed when I finally pull my face away. My lips are red and swollen. I'm out of breath. And I'm grinning like an idiot.

I seriously am.

Chinese food on the floor, whiskey propped up on the bedside table, and a warm and willing person -- my brother does not count as a man -- in my arms? What more could I want?

"You mean we could have done this since I was eighteen?" I whisper, grinning wickedly.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I nod grinning, my own lips are swollen and red. "I'm shocked you didn't realize it the day I did," I admit, "it was the day I first came home for leave and you were on the couch in Dad's study.

I couldn't breath you looked so beautiful all sprawled out, hair in your pale face."

My voice is dreamy as I talk, but it's a memory I relished for years...hell if Peter only knew about the boys I acted out the fantasy version of that memory with....he would most likely be shocked.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

My body is screaming for Peter to speed up, to thrust harder because I'm so damm close I could come without anyone even touching my cock. My eyes snap to Peter's face and I shiver at how deep and dark they have become. It's almost like I can see into his soul.

"Peter," I gasp, "I love you Peter."

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

As if I thought any other thing! My belly traps my brother's erection between out bodies, the friction of my thrusts and our grinding against one another. I still am not sure if I'm doing this right, but the way he holds me, the way I'm gasping and sweating against him....sure.

Surely this has got to--

My mind blanks and I feel my self shudder. I cry out as my seed fills him, incestuous love fully consummated right here in my bedroom. I collapse against him, still shaking. I don't think I've come so hard in my life.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

When Peter comes inside me my muscles tighten around him milking his cock for every moment of pleasure I can spare as the world whites out around me.

I come back to myself realizing I'm come on my stomach and Peter's as well as seeing some of my seed splashed across the floor. I feel completely boneless and relaxed in a way I haven't felt for moments. Who knew sleeping with my brother would result in the best sex of my life.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

Pressing my face against his neck, pulling out only when I am far too soft to stay inside of him, I let Nathan roll us both onto our sides. I need to be held, but I don't even have to ask. He's got his arms around me at once and we spend a few moments just breathing in each other's breath.

I can feel myself smiling, it's involuntary and wonderful. We waited too long for this. My fingertips touch his throat. Nathan only had to nearly die a few times for me to realize how deeply it is I love him.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I want to laugh, but it doesn't seem right and I don't want to ruin the moment. I want to memorize every moment of this night. We won't have another first time. I kiss Peter again, slowly this time then I pull back to gaze at him.

"Peter that was....."