Brotherly Love

[chimeramimicry]

I'm almost too late.  I can feel the surge of air in the room before I even pry open the door.  We're up at the penthouse level, the suites.  It's high enough for the broken windows to suck the doors closed.  I'm breathless when I push my way inside.  I see the scuffle.  I hear Nathan's labored breathing.  I have no idea what I do exactly.

It goes back to a time when I lost Nathan.  I was young when my brother went off to serve his country in the Navy.  We're thirteen years apart.  It's a lifetime, really.  I didn't understand that my brother would not be there to wake up to anymore, or to climb into his bed when the monsters came.

The monsters have come again.  One in particular.  One I'm not strong enough to fight.  And yet, he leaves Nathan to me. Badly wounded, hardly breathing, sure.  But alive.  I can almost feel my knees give out as I scoop him up to my chest.  I should go after Sylar.  But I can't move from Nathan's side.

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[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

My eyes are entirely too expressive. I need to figure out a way to mask what I'm feeling so that when things like these happen, I can lie and set one aching mind at ease. It's all I want right now, to be able to tell Nathan what he wants to hear. What I wish was true. Sighing, I squeeze my brother's hand even tighter and bring it up to my lips. Little kisses for comfort. We both need them.

"Sylar got away," I finally say, looking at Nathan's lips because I can not look into his eyes and say these things. I feel itchy. And upset. "And Claire... God Nathan, I'm sorry. I don't know."

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I close my eyes a moment, Peter is being far open about his emotions right now and it's dangerous...so dangerous. If we got caught it would be over for us.

Not only that but Sylar has gotten away...again. Why does he always get to live while my family suffers. It's not right...it isn't fair and dammit once I'm out of this bed I will hunt him down and kill him.

I open my eyes and smile at Peter thought it hurts. I try to tell him it will be alright with my eyes, but I'm not sure he sees it.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I'm tired of being the little brother. Nathan has sat at my bedside more than I can count starting with when I had my tonsils out at age five, to the garden hoe accident that has left my lower lip sometimes limp, to the night in Texas when I collapsed outside of jail.

Wires be damned, I'm going to join my brother in bed. They'll kick me out soon, and when they do, I'll track down our mother and Claire and bring them here. Nathan needs more than me. He's always needed more than what I alone can give.

My head has not touched his shoulder like this in years. My arm across his chest misses all of the tubes that need to be where they are. I just need a moment. I thought he had died. I thought he'd stay dead.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I lean into Peter happily, Peter's claim that he and I are connected has never been truer then the moments we've shared since this whole powers thing began over three years ago.

Ever since Peter was born he's been mine. I know M knows we are closer then brothers, how could she not after all her dreams and years of watching Peter and I do all we can to crawl into each others skin to get the connection we crave.

I hate this place, I want these tubes off and I want to be in bed with the man I love more then life. It's not fair.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I keep my eyes closed, not wanting to see the nurses as they come rushing in here to save a man from being further injured by my need for his affection. He's not always the best brother. He's not always nice to me. He thinks he's got my best interest at heart when in actuality, he's just serving his own interests.

Someone asked me once how I can still stand Nathan. How I can still do anything for him. The answer is simple. He's my brother. I love my brother.

I can feel my muscles relaxing as he tries to rub my back. Neither of us are speaking. Neither of us need to right now. I know he's feeling lost. Afraid. But he doesn't feel so alone when I'm here.

It takes almost half an hour for them to come for me, and I'm right, they kick me out like gargage. I need to find Mom. And Nathan's daughter. I need to put our family right again after Sylar.

I can't believe he actually thought he was won of us.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I panic when they pull Peter away from me and it takes two pumps of my morphine drip before I sleep. Even then my dreams are full of terror and fears as I think of all the trouble Peter could be getting into without me.

I do not feel rested at all when I open up my eyes again. The doctor standing by my bedside telling my about the damage to my vocal cords doesn't help my discord. It will take time, he says, but he doesn't think I'll speak above a whisper again, if I speak again.

I'm angry rather then sad.....Sylar will pay for this if I have to hunt him down alone. He has done far too much damage to my family to live.

I have never hated anyone as much as I hate him, it burns inside of me with a passion that might scare anyone else, but not me...I'm ready for it.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I didn't realize I'd be gone so long. Trying to round up my family is like herding cats. My eyes are still red when I arrive back at my brother's hospital room, but I can't get to him. Mom's in the way. Claire too. There's staff there-- I shouldn't have left, not that I had a choice. "You're going to behave this time?" one large guard asks me as I shy away from him. "I will drag you off again."

No one's paying attention to that. Thankfully. It's really very embarrasing that I couldn't control myself earlier. He's my brother, of course.

My soul mate, but I'm not gonna say that outloud. I'm not deranged, not really.

I catch what the doctor's are saying later than everyone else, when it's only our mother left in the room and I'm sitting in the corner, feeling drained. He might ever speak again. Is that...possible? I can hardly look at Nathan. I was too late afterall.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I need to touch Peter and I reach out my hand. I can't lean forward because of the tubes and wires but my intent is clear. I know he's blaming himself for what happened and I feel I need to reassure him that I don't think it's his fault.

We'll figure out a way we can communicate, we've always been good at that from code words to get out of parties, to secret jokes, even that set of foot signals for holiday dinners.

I always used to think that God made us brothers as a joke or better yet to test us. He wanted to see if we could find a way to love each other without letting anyone else see.

And I think we've done pretty good so far.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I glance at our mother and frown as she wipes at her eyes. She smiles at me when i look at her, as if trying to say that she's strong and not that her favorite son is possibly ruined for the rest of his life. "Mom," I whisper, never one for the 'ma' my older brother uses, "why don't you get yourself some coffee. I can take over for a little while."

"You're always such a good boy, Peter."

Yes. A good boy, I think to myself. I wish that was so. The moment she's gone, my lips are back on Nathan's hand and I gaze feircely at him with waivering eyes. "We can get you fixed," I said, as if it's a promise. I only wish it was.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

Fixed...fixed that should ring some bells with me but for the moment I can't get my brain to go where it needs to because the drugs are still clouding my mind.

Then it hits me...the bomb...Peter said Adam did something to heal me but he never said what...maybe there is a way to repeat the process. I risk talking to get the point across to Peter hoping he'll understand.

"Adam...bomb...heal?" I say in a garbled tone.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I can hardly make out what Nathan's saying, and though I long to climb into bed with him, I can not. All I can do it lean in against him and have him press his lips to my ear. He says it again and I pause, blinking. Of course! Of--

My eyes are wide open as I clutch at Nathan's shoulder. "Adam is dead." But Claire is not. My eyes are shimmering in the darkness between us, despite the bright lights behind my head. "But I know someone else...we just need to get you out of here first."

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I smile brightly as I can and nod to show Peter I'm willing to do what I have to to get well again. I reach with one hand and tap one of the machines I'm hooked up to.

"Alarms," I say softly, "go off if wires out."

It's sad that I know that, but when you've been in the hospital as much as I have you pick up a lot.

"Slip it to me," I ask twice to make sure it's clear enough.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I'm not really sure what he's getting at, I can only make out ever other word, but I do my best to do what he wants. My hand shakes as I carefully pull over the equiptment, doing my best not to jostle anything. I'm so afraid of hurting him more. Claire might be able to heal him, of course. But not if I kill him before she can.

I want to tell Nathan that we can wait a few days for him to get checked out of here, but we both know that Sylar's on the loose. Each moment that we wait here is another moment that Sylar can hurt someone else. Do something else.

I gaze into his eyes. My heart's in my throat as I touch his cheek. We share the same eyes. But he's so much older than I am. He's seen so much more. He's hurt me so many times. I just don't care. I've forgiven worse.

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I lean into Peter's touch trying to tell him without words that I want this, that the longer we wait the more Sylar can get away with using my face and the faces of others. He could seriously hurt someone with that power.

Once the wires and tubes are out I sit up slowly using Peter's shoulders and arms to brace myself as I struggle to my fee. I look around for something better to put on and find a pair of blue scrubs in the closet.

I grab them and quickly dress, they still make me stand out but it's better they those hospital gown. I then turn and take Peter's hand and squeeze it. "Fly," I mouth.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I don't know where to go, but I put my arms around my brother and he puts them around me. The moment we get near a window that I can pry open and get us outside with, I do just that. Nathan is my number one priority. I am as careful as I possibly can be.

I jump into the air and though we fall for almost two seconds, the sky is ours. I love the wind in my hair. I always envied Nathan, being a pilot, being able to do this. Though my powers are limited, flight is still my favorite power.

Maybe because it's Nathan's.

I take Nathan to my apartment. It's risky, but it's all I can do. It's my place. And Nathan deserves a place to rest. My bed's the best bet for that.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

((bump the next?))

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I kick in as much power as I dare when we fly while trying not to tire myself out. Even so by the time we get to Peter's apartment I'm winded and trying not to throw up,

I stumble to the bed room and collapse on the bed. This was not how I thought I would get into my brother's bed...hell the last time I was in here I was drunk off my ass most of the time. That gets me wondering if Peter every realized I slept in here and wore his clothes during those four months.

Okay no time for those thoughts Nathan....it's all about not dying right now....and not getting Peter's sheets bloody."

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

Thank God I know what I'm doing. My kit is here, it's so well stocked that i could probably do triage if I had to. Nathan looks so lost and so small, not at all like the older brother I've loved for my entire life. As I set about checking his dressings, I can't help but reminisce.

"Do you remember...last time I had you in bed and we were playing doctor?" It sounds so wrong. Playing doctor was always a sexual sort of game, but not for my brother and me. "I was six...so you had to be seventeen, eighteen. You sprained your ankle. I forget why, some sport you were being a peacock for. You let me change your ace bandage and I ended up coloring in perminant markers all over your legs while you slept."

I grin, and Nathan's doing the very best he can to grin too, despite the injury.

"I think that was right before my kindergarten teacher called mom to tell her that what i wanted to do when I grow up was marry you."

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I bite my lip to keep from laughing as Peter works on my dressings, it would hurt too much if I did. Peter was what I called a sweet terror when he was a kid.

He was shy with people he didn't know, but with me he didn't hesitate to pounce into my life whenever he wanted to. From jumping on my bed to coloring my legs Peter never failed to make me laugh, give me a hug or love me no matter what happened.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

I'm an expert nurse and EMT. I am quite capable of doing anything for my brother that he needs, at least medically. I sigh, sitting back, a smile on my lips and in my eyes. "Almost good as new," I murmur. "I think I like it that you can't talk."

Maybe that's a little cruel. I pull off his shoes and then my own, stripping off my coat just after as I climb into bed with him.

"I can get a word in edgewise this way."

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I snort through my nose at him and give him a gentle swat in answer. Peter talked more then me and Dad put together. I was lucky to be able to take a breath when he was around.

I can't help myself I give Peter a nuzzle breathing in his scent. If he were to bottle it, he would seriously make a mint and then some.

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

"You'll rip your stitches!" I say as he pressed his face against my neck. I have to literally push him down by his shoulder and half lay over him to keep him still. My stupid brother. We've spent the last few months being enemies. I've had my gun drawn on him, he's had me tasered, he's made dirty deals for me with women he's been intimate with, he's lied about me, made me lose my job because everyone thought I was suicidal, he's used me for his own gain. The laundry list makes me press my face against his shoulder.

It doesn't matter. I forgive him so easily. I love him so effortlessly. He might be rotten to the core, but I know he loves me too.

I close my eyes and try to relax. We'll need our rest. I need to track down Claire after this. "Nathan..."

I wait for him to stop stroking my back as an answer.

"Promise that we can be together this time."

[prezstandsalone.livejournal.com]

I feel my eyes fill with tears and a few slip down my cheeks as I nod and squeeze Peter's hand in answer. I want nothing better then to be with him forever. He is my life, my heart and my soul.

I take a deep, deep, breath and speak my true heart for the first time since Peter was born. "I....love....you."

[chimeramimic.livejournal.com]

"I love you too," I say without hesitation. Nathan's told me this before and I've repeated it over and over. It's true. I love him. My smile is soft and I lift my head just in time to see him cry.

Why? These tears are not necessary. I lick my lips, afraid that he's in pain. I don't have sedatives stronger than the stuff you can get over the counter. I should have taken from from the hospital.

I wasn't thinking.

"I'll go see Claire," I whisper. "I'll bring her power back and heal you."